It’s gone again! Technorati nicked my button. What is going on? Are they playing hard to get? Am I going to have to go out and buy them chocolates to woo them back to me? I will! I’ll do anything! It may be illegal in Mississippi, but whatever it is I’ll do it. I don’t care, just stop messing with my head!
I have been sitting in front of this glowing screen so much, these past few days, I think I can feel myself physically changing. My legs are flopping uselessly about, unclear as to their purpose any more. My eyes, meanwhile, are growing enlarged like those of other nocturnal animals, but reddened and crazed and no longer able to focus on anything more than 3 feet away. My fingers are becoming elongated and my brain desensitized to caffeine. My sense of humor, left yesterday for the bar, telling me she needed some “alone-time” and God only knows what’s happened to my hair. When I finally emerge, blinking into the daylight, people will point and stare. “Whisper, whisper”, they will say, and feel pity. Perhaps they will give me some loose change.
So Wide Web of the World, pity a poor blogger in way over her hurtin’ head.