Comments on: The Elevator Rides Of Our Lives

By: apprentice

apprentice — Thu, 01 Mar 2007 13:12:47 +0000

Great piece Sam. I immediately though of the Peter Sellers out take, where he has to fart in a lft, but they all keep cracking up.

I like the sweet wee French apartment lifts with their lovely wrought iron gates, but they usually smell of cat pee.
The film The Apartment makes great use of lifts, and its one of my fav movies ever.

The Empire State Building lift feels like you’rr travelling in the Space Shuttle.

Going up…….. first floor haberdashery…..

By: Kara

Kara — Wed, 28 Feb 2007 21:12:04 +0000

You’ve forgotten the long hate-filled dialogue to your cell phone as it loses reception at the precise moment the door closes. I seethe just thinking about it. Seethe. And it’s all so counter-productive.

By: Sam, Problemchildbride

Sam, Problemchildbride — Tue, 27 Feb 2007 01:29:51 +0000

Joel – apparantly “in rare circumstances” the effects can linger for 4 hours after which you have to consult a medical person. Still, it’s the top selling medication in America. I guess the benefits must outweight the risk!

Aunty M, for the most liberal peoples in Europe the Dutch are surprisingly efficient. They get stuff done. Who says pot-smokers aren’t productive?

Old Knudsen. It was a film. You were shot through the flat-cap by a terrorist who was scared of lifts and had taken the stairs. Siskel and Ebert said your performance was sensitive and nuanced as far as they could tell through the censor’s bleep-outs.

Carolyn – keep singing! The new lift-rider could be an agent who, after a day’s auditions, is convinced he won’t find the next starlet in Port Moresby and is having a terrible day. Until, that is, he steps into a lift and hears a voice so sweet and melodic it causes the flowers on his ill-chosen tie to open and butterflies to fly out of his ears. And both your lives are changed forever. Keep singing!

fmc, snogging should be part of everyone’s life lift experiences. I was staying in a hotel in Leeds last year on my way to a wedding. In the morning I was on my way down for an early breakfast when the lift door on my floor opened and a flushed and dishevelled couple giggled their way out having obviously just had a good old rummage. They were in their 50s and probably having an affair but all the same, it was very sweet.

Fluffag, well, some button somewhere was certainly getting pressed! I guessed the earth, or the floor at least, moved for them. Will they ever go back for old times’ sake, as it *cough* were?

Jen, keep taking the lift – worse things happen in stairwells than in elevators, if Robert De Nero movies are anything to go by.

Pat, ha! That’s great! What happened to your eyes? Did they widen in astonishment, or wince, or merely water in the vapours?

By: Pat

Pat — Mon, 26 Feb 2007 18:31:48 +0000

I was visiting my sister in New York ,left her at her office at an astronical floor and then was then let loose on New York. I was scared s——s and it was such a vast emporioum considered going up and down in the lift all day. Finally girded my loins and the first person I asked directions from was a Brit!
Re farts: try keeping your face straight when you are on stage and someone farts in the front row. Fartuitously it was a comedy. One can control one’s face apparently, but not one’s eyes.

By: JenPen

JenPen — Mon, 26 Feb 2007 18:10:36 +0000

any time I enter the lift since I read that, Sami, I think what could happen now…damn obsession, reminds me of the novel about the guy that had wonderful beard… and was asked where! he puts it when he goes to sleep – above the cover or under it – thinking of that he had several sleepless nights and finally he shaved.

shall I use the stairs instead????

By: fluffag

fluffag — Mon, 26 Feb 2007 17:59:58 +0000

One of my best friends conceived her son in a lift. I assume there was only her and the father-to-be in the lift at the time. It was either the fastest conception in history or they just kept pressing the button as the building only had three floors.

By: fatmammycat

fatmammycat — Mon, 26 Feb 2007 17:53:10 +0000

I have spent many a good lift ride snogging. It’s the only way to travel in them.

By: Carolyn

Carolyn — Sun, 25 Feb 2007 22:56:02 +0000

I always sing to myself when I’m alone in the lift, then stop when the door opens and someone comes in and have a terrible guilty look on my face, so people get suspicious. I didn’t fart, I was singing!

By: Old Knudsen

Old Knudsen — Sun, 25 Feb 2007 19:54:50 +0000

I once had to explode a lift to kill several terrorists, no wait they might have been a film.

By: auntymarianne

auntymarianne — Sun, 25 Feb 2007 16:44:31 +0000

I was once stuck in a lift with a bunch of colleagues. One of them calmly lifted the emergency phone, dialled his secretary, and dictated a letter to her.

He was Dutch. I don’t know whether this has anything to do with it.