Name That Sound!
Here is the sound of something happening. What is it?
“Heave-ho. You got the other side, Carl? Good – on the count of three, one, two, three… Good.”
Click…Click…
“Just hold still there madam, bit of clipping still to do, just for the look of the thing. Shouldn’t take a minute. Super.
Bzzzzzzhhhhhhhhhrrrrrr
Snip!
Snippety, snippety….snip.
“There we are madam, you’re ready to go. You might notice them chafing at first but that usually goes away within the week. Righto then. What? Oh no, there’s no charge here, madam, haha! Nooooo! Nooohohoho! I do it for the love of the thing, me. Plus it earns me a few extra brownie points with the Big Guy which doesn’t hurt, hoho.”
“Trust me, madam, you’ll be glad you went for a custom fit. They’ll last forever unlike these off-the-peg ones you get from the shysters outside the gates. Not a thing we can do about ‘em though, heaven knows we’ve tried. “Not in our jurisdiction” apparently according from the memo from on high. What can you do? Anyway, don’t forget to tell your friends!
Bye-bye, then. Steady as you go, don’t tip over hahaha! Bye-bye. Byeee. Bub-bye.”
CLOMP CLOMP CLOMP
Tinkle…bang.
“Well!…May the good lord forgive me for saying so, Carl, but it seems they’re letting anyone in these days. Did you see the Marilyn Manson tour-shirt on that one? Did you know that monster has songs called things like “The Angel With The Scabbed Wings” and “You And Me And The Devil Makes 3″ and filth like that?”
“My Andrea says he’s got a song called “Coma Black” and “Just A Car-Crash Away” too.
“Huh.”
“Hey ho though, best get on. No rest for the wicked, haha.”
(Answer will be posted anonish.)
May 30th, 2008 at 12:23 am
It was a furry armchair, custom-fitted to the shape of your bottom. I pity anything that has to endure being forcibly shaved.
May 30th, 2008 at 12:31 am
Close, Nanas, close. No what am I talking about? That wasn’t in the littlest bit close. I like the idea of a custom-fitted furry armchair though. I’d want mine to have Jim’ll Fix It Secret compartments too though, and a wee fridge
May 30th, 2008 at 12:38 am
Here’s a clue: there are clues.
May 30th, 2008 at 2:32 am
You were on a dude-ess ranch, getting saddled up on a hoss a la Annie Oakley?
May 30th, 2008 at 2:33 am
Oh, and chaps are involved. Yeehaw!
May 30th, 2008 at 3:48 am
The blogger?s handbook clearly states that this stuff is not allowed, check the ?this is not allowed? chapter before the ?don?t mess with wigi boards ?section. Other bloggers who tried similar stuff were put in stocks and pelted with rotten eggs. So God agreed that bloggers shouldn’t do this anymore, to protect the bloggers you understand. But and because I don?t really care and am not in any way thinking about your post or haven?t looked for clues and written down little bits of it, well?. are there wings being fitted and angels involved?
Not that I?m bothered like?.
May 30th, 2008 at 4:40 am
If stuff chafes in heaven, what the hell am I being good for?
*stomps off to find a small animal to kick*
May 30th, 2008 at 7:34 am
It’s either angels getting winged up or a bikini wax; I need another clue.
Cheers.
May 30th, 2008 at 12:49 pm
Stonking ten-inch heels. Definitely footwear of some kind…
May 30th, 2008 at 1:01 pm
You bought poodle?
May 30th, 2008 at 1:25 pm
Sniffle and Cry is the winner! As the first correct guesser of “the sound of an angel getting her wings”, he wins a virtually gorgeous rosette and a pint next time I’m in Ireland.
Well done valiant guessers! Unfortunately though you win nothing.
And that rather puts paid to that doesn’t it? Guess I need another post now to fill the awkward silence. I thought that one would last longer.
May 30th, 2008 at 2:32 pm
I feel pretty, oh so pretty, so pretty and witty and woooooooooooooooooo.
I’ve never won a gorgeous rosette before, and I feel speech, a virtual speech coming on ” t? ath?s orm an rosette aileann seo a glacadh le foireann siniffle agus caoineadh”
Thank you very much and goodnight
May 30th, 2008 at 11:55 pm
You know where I went wrong? No of course you don’t, because you didn’t see or hear me go anywhere. But anyway I was put off by “Tinkle”. You see in our home – back when I had a home – Tinkle is something you do in the bathroom. And I don’t mean have a bath. Although arguably that was a much more subtle clue than the Marilyn Manson t-shirt. If you lived in our home.
May 31st, 2008 at 1:37 am
Alas I am too late but I watched Titania clout Oberon with enormous beautiful feathery wings yesterday in Cardiff.
May 31st, 2008 at 6:34 am
i’m glad i didn’t volunteer a guess. i’d have sounded very silly.
May 31st, 2008 at 7:57 am
I didn’t read the posts with the guesses. Believe me?
My guess: angel wings!
Oh.
Okay.
Never mind.
May 31st, 2008 at 10:38 am
There was a cartoon I saw in a newpaper once.
Panel 1. Welcome to Heaven. Here’s your wings and your harp.
Panel 2. Welcome to Hell. Here’s your horns and your accordeon.
June 1st, 2008 at 10:11 am
I thought it was a dog getting a haircut and new harness.
Probably because my two beasties think everything’s about them and I’m buying into that.