Che, mon ami ecossais! The last time they got carving knives and drip-stands mixed up on the ward I wasn’t a patient in, it was red. That’s all I remember, It was all very red. Purplish and quivery in some spots, but mostly red.

Mary, We Brits long ago in evolutionary history had a poker shoved up our ancestral arse leading to an upper lip that tends to stiffness especially in fun and relaxed atmospheres. In the easier, looser-lipped Southern parts of Europe no such poker was applied but Nature found its own way of discouraging yabbering: The perforating upper lip moustache. A yabber too far and some annoyed soul will tear off the upper lip off the yabberer’s face and not give it back til he shuts up.

Ellis, you were far ahead of me in the field of sharpened nipples , my friend. I remember your picture well. Always remember though, he that is at the front of the field of sharpened nipples will always have to run faster than those at the back. God, I’m wise, aren’t I? Cheers for the link!

Or the madwoman in the tv room with the carving knife ?

I hate this game. I prefer Monopoly, and only then ’cause my gran taught us all to cheat at a very early age.

Some mighty fine writing there, however, Problem.